You did it again. You took a decent-sized chunk out of your goatee, and now you’re about to shave off the whole damn thing. Hold on. Before you do, let’s talk about a few things. One, why you shouldn’t overreact and shave it off. And two, how to maintain your goatee so this doesn’t happen again.
Don’t Shave it Off
Repeat after me. “My goatee does not have to be perfect. I am not Tony Stark.” Like in Hawthorne’s “The Birthmark”, there is a certain beauty in our imperfections. Excessive precision reeks of self-absorption. Additionally, no one notices your goatee imperfections more than you. Most people just see a guy with a goatee. They’re not studying you to make sure you’re groomed perfectly. So, unless you took out a half-inch notch, leave it alone. If you have taken a small piece off, don’t worry. It will grow back. That’s hair’s job.
How to Maintain Your Goatee
First, do not touch your mustache with your razor. I personally think goatees look best with a full mustache, but if you want to clean it up a little, I’ll get to that. The next step is to choose your weapon. A straight razor is going to be the most precise choice, but will also require the most skill. My personal preference, a safety razor, strikes the right balance between precision and practicality. Finally, a cartridge razor will be simplest to use, but the blocky cartridge makes it difficult to see where you are actually shaving. I would recommend ditching the Gillette Fusion for numerous reasons.
When shaving the sides of your goatee, go wider than you think you need to. You can always clean it up and shave a little closer. However, it is impossible to put hair back on. (Believe me, the top of my head wishes this weren’t true.) Place your index finder over the side your want to shave and use that as a guide for getting the right thickness. This might take a little practice, but eventually your hands will find the appropriate positioning.
Once you have shaved the sides of your goatee, it’s time to move on to the easier chin. First find the soft spot directly behind your chin bone and use that as your guide. Shave your neck while maintaining the stop position of that spot. Do not worry too much about where your goatee ends, your chin will hide most of it. Simply try to keep the bottom line as straight as possible.
Once you’ve finished your shave to your liking, decide if you need to perform any maintenance to clean up the length or edges. You can apply a little lather with your finger to a touch up spot, and make very short strokes to tidy up any missed spots. DO NOT strive for perfection! That sets you down the path of unlimited touch-ups until you look like Ming the Merciless. For some extra precision I recommend picking up a mustache razor and the accompanying blades. You can use this to manage the mustache too. As far as trimming the length of your goatee, I suggest using scissors as needed. Clippers will definitely be faster, but blades, like scissors, are much better for your hair.
In the end, go easy on your goatee. The goal is imperfection. The tools should be blades. And the result should be clean, but not sculpted. Do you have any questions, tips, tricks, or advice on how to maintain your goatee? Leave them in the comments below!
